The adventures of a self-taught songwriter
I think one of the few certainties I have about myself, is that I need to constantly be creating. I have ideas constantly pouring out of my head and one of my favorite ways to express myself is by writing songs. Songwriting was never a phase, it has been a constant throughout my life. I think I started writing my first lyrics when I was around 12 years old. I’m most definitely not a prodigy, and back then they were mostly cringy teenage drama songs. I started off playing it by ear, because I didn’t have formal musical training and I didn’t even have a clue what a C major chord was. But since I’ve always loved singing, I think I had a good grasp on how to build melodies and I understood the structure of the songs I listened to. My first songs had absolutely no harmony. With the aid of my junior high music teacher, a couple of them were harmonized. It was all very exciting for me and I had written all over my school notebooks little verses and phrases that came to me when I got bored. Around that time I decided to become a professional musician.
I wanted to kick off my weekly blogs with this topic because I’m aware that the songs I write are a bit unusual and I don’t try to follow any genre in particular. I didn’t have any specific songwriting training. It has been a very personal journey and I think it’s worth sharing. If you’re an aspiring composer/songwriter this might be helpful too, because I want to show you that the best way to find your voice is to get to know yourself. Your experiences are unique, and this is what will make you different to the rest of your colleagues. So buckle up, and enjoy the ride!...
Baby steps are still steps!
I didn’t start any formal musical training until I was around 13-14 years old. Back then, an aunt of mine recommended me to get Finale, a music notation software. I was just learning how to read music but that didn’t stop me from somehow starting to write little scores for my songs. Of course, when I look at them now they are a disaster in terms of calligraphy, but I notice that even though I didn’t know anything about composing, I had pretty good harmonic and melodic intuition. I used to spend hours in Finale. Of course I relied on its MIDI playback since I was just starting to play the piano and learn solfege.
I started my training as a classical pianist, so I was constantly listening to classical music and it soon became a part of my ‘musical ear’. Back then I also discovered the music genre Symphonic Metal and I was blown away by their epic orchestrations and their pretty consistent pop song structures. For me it was the best of both worlds. As soon as I started to learn chords and scales, my songs started to have a better shape. But the funny thing is, I was still writing everything as a full score, writing note by note. In later years I would learn more efficient ways to make sheet music, and how to use chord symbols. For better or worse, this inefficient way to write songs prepared me really well to tackle other challenges that come with notating bigger compositions.
Another interesting fact is my constant struggle with the rhythm section of a band. I was never in a band as a teenager, I was your nerdy antisocial classical pianist. Sure, I used to listen to rock, metal and pop, but the way to even approach writing for guitar, bass and drums was a complete mystery to me. So my early songs…(and even some of the recent ones)...didn’t have any of those. You can listen to my old EP ‘Condemned to Dream’ and see what I mean. (Bear in mind that this was my very first release 7 years ago)
The absence of these elements pushed me away from writing music with a specific genre in mind, because a big part of what the rhythm section provides to an arrangement is the song’s style and groove. I ended up with an unusual pop/goth/classical sound. So you could say that the lack of experience with the usual band setup influenced my creative direction. Of course, my first attempts were no masterpieces, but I had found my voice through this writing process, and I decided to embrace it and keep developing the sound to create more mature music as my career moved forward.
As I progressed with my music education, I became aware of tools, resources, and creative techniques that I was able to complement with the way I worked to become a better writer. My sound is not conventional or commercial, but it comes from the heart, and it’s an honest reflection of who I am as a person. This is also why I decided not to do a major in songwriting at Berklee. I had zero interest in the business of crafting songs for other artists or learning writing formulas for the next big hits (Disclaimer: I’m not saying this is a bad thing. There are a lot of writers that did this program and create wonderful and unique music. I just didn’t feel it was the best fit for me). I already had a very personal vision with the sound I wanted to develop, and I wanted to focus on something else that I was sure would enhance my creative writing even more…
…Storytelling
Even though I majored in Film Scoring, I never stopped writing songs. On the contrary, I implemented the things I learned in my songwriting process. I also did a minor in English Literature, and as you can imagine, this made me dig even deeper into storytelling for both songs and film scoring purposes.
Stories inspire me everyday. I’m particularly interested in surrealism, dreams, existential questions and psychology. But I honestly enjoy from the silliest cartoons to the darkest thrillers. Through the years I’ve been influenced by literature, visual arts and cinema. Little by little, the weird pop/goth/classical sound I had when I started writing shifted to a more cinematic style. As a film composer, I learned how to emphasize emotion through music and with that in mind I began to add more dimension to the concept of each song. I think my album ‘Spirals’ is a clear example of this, because sonically each song is its own little universe, but together as a concept album they tell a story. (The album launch is on Fall 2020! Follow me on socials to stay updated).
The language of creativity: a conversation between creator and creation
One of the questions that is asked about songwriting pretty often is ‘what do you do first: music or lyrics?’. And the answer to this is very personal depending on each songwriter. I think the act of creating cannot be taught beyond getting technical guidance to refine your craft and have a better understanding of the medium you are using to portray your message. But in my case, I think I’ve written songs in all sorts of ways: music first, lyrics first, both at the same time. As long as you have an idea; something to say, you can start writing.
I’m sure there are ways to write a song in a very efficient way just as I know ways to write a film score in time to meet the deadline. And I say this because I’m anything but efficient when it comes to writing my personal songs. Funny enough though, procrastination has been key to my consistency and effortless discipline ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. It happens that I’m a huge procrastinator, and every time I had to sit down at the piano to study my music school repertoire, I always got distracted and started fooling around, just improvising, and very often I would find a motive or a little comping pattern that I liked. A few minutes later, I had the seed for a new song. But because I was always too busy doing something else for music school, I never really hurried up with finishing a song. This backfired a couple of times, because when you write, it’s nice to have some momentum. In some other cases though, it wasn’t that bad, because in the meantime I was able to learn more about composing and writing lyrics, and I was also a little more mature. This allowed me to look back at the idea I had and revise it to make a better version.
So, if I have a piano comp going on and a bit of a melody but no lyrics, I will just start singing gibberish on top of the idea. Later, with lyrics, I will start refining it a little and make little concessions between words and melodic rhythm. But first, when I sing gibberish it’s just me having a conversation with this new musical idea that has come to me so I can get to know it better. It’s a bit abstract, but this process allows me to not be a 100% set on something and try different directions the melody and harmonic structure could take. I think the beauty of improvisation is that it fits the form you’re playing naturally, as if you’re learning to speak the language of this particular song, and you start to feed each bar with sentences (phrases) and words (notes). Each time I play over the same passage, I get closer to a concrete idea, and right about then I start to ask the question: what is this song about? If there’s something that I’ve written down recently as an independent verse, I’ll try it out with my new melody. It often fits, and I think it’s because they are both impressions of what was going on in my life at that point in time, so they complement each other. Music might be abstract but when you engage in this sort of meditation/improvisation, it really gives away your present state of mind.
Your vision throughout the production stages
As a young naive wannabe songwriter, I used to think that a song’s arrangement was there from the beginning of the writing process and it was all carefully notated just like a classical orchestral score. It was until I attended the Berklee Songwriting Workshop that I understood that the core of a song are the lyrics, melody and chords, and everything else comes afterwards working around that skeleton. Of course, this made my writing process a whole lot easier, and once I took some arranging classes I understood how an actual contemporary score needed to be notated. But most of the time I have a pretty good idea on how I want the song to sound fully orchestrated and arranged from a very early writing stage. Sometimes I will sequence a mockup with just my first verse and will start orchestrating that right away. I’m making everything as I go, so the arrangement to me is something that is deeply embedded in the song from the moment it’s conceived.
I always say that if I had a band, the line up would be a string quintet, piano, synths, drums and vocals. I love writing for strings and I often begin writing their parts very early in the game. If I were to describe the core of my arrangements, my priorities are the strings, piano and vocals. In fact, when working on the production of my album ‘Spirals’, I told the producer that he was pretty much free to throw any ideas and change anything he wanted from the arrangement of the song except the strings. I think it’s important to know your strengths and take good care of the elements you feel give your sound some uniqueness. That’s why even in the mix and mastering stages I was always looking out for the strings to be really clear and well balanced with the rest of the elements. And I think this is why I still don’t have any electric guitars on my production, because I feel they will absolutely drown out the strings and it’s the last thing I want. Believe me, the ‘intense’ songs still sound very intense without guitars. I prefer relying on the grittiness and edginess of industrial drum beats.
I think another important thing to consider before hitting the studio to start producing, is to find a producer that respects and understands your vision. It doesn’t matter if you write pop, rock, hip-hop, country, or weird stuff like me...the important thing is to find a good creative partnership where ideas can flow both ways and there’s good chemistry within the team. Sometimes the job can get pretty stressful and consuming so this is why you want to have the best attitude and to be able to trust each other with the decisions made. Remember that a healthy mind leads to better ideas, and a great creative flow.
In conclusion!...
Creating any piece of art is a very complex and personal process. The learning process is very personal as well, but I would advise to always seek out guidance in the more technical aspects of your craft so you can incorporate it to your artistry and become efficient in your workflow.
Songwriting is a part of me, and I’m constantly learning how to become a better writer. I write songs not only hoping to make a living, but to feel complete as a person and artist.
I hope you enjoyed this entry! I’ll be uploading a new one every Wednesday and I’ll be talking about lots of stuff: personal experience, Berklee, music, mental health, art, etc. Let me know in the comments if you want me to write about a specific topic. I’d like this blog to be a place where you and I can have a conversation. I look forward to reading you!
See you next week!
Monica Lyrae
Composer, songwriter, professional procrastinator